Family Meetings
2/15/2001
Family meetings are an excellent way to practice problem solving, promote communication and build family harmony. When a plan is discussed and mutually agreed upon, everyone feels valued and important. When children see their family working together as a group, they are more likely to go along with the plan that has been established.
Family meetings might be used to deal with daily decisions, such as who will drive the kids to practice or how chores are to be distributed. A meeting might also be called to plan a vacation or family project, or to clear the air after a family crisis. At times, meetings may cover major issues such as developing a plan of action for handling a drop in family income.
The process is easier if meetings begin when children are young. Teenagers and adolescents may show resistance at first but most come to value the process once they understand it’s a time to air concerns, discuss solutions and share positive moments.
In introducing the idea of family meetings in your home, you may want to establish a structured routine:
Ask for subjects of concern or issues for discussion. Create a list and discuss them one at a time. Some families will be more comfortable with less structure. If your children are older, try starting more informally.
When a problem is identified, ask each member to share their concerns and possible solutions.
Be sure to be respectful of your children’s ideas. Do not be critical or demeaning to their position. Try to understand how they’re thinking about the subject and the ideas they are trying to convey. If you must disagree, offer your perspective in a manner that is fair and sensitive to your children’s feelings.
After everyone has contributed, work together to find a solution that works for everyone.
Conclude by recognizing everyone’s positive effort and talk over how the family might continue to use this process in the future.
