How Strong Families Fight Stress
12/15/2000
Poor communication, troublesome behavior, time pressure, money issues, unequal household responsibilities, anger and guilt–most families have one or more of these problems on occasion. When family members feel rushed and pressured, their communication skills suffer and other problems get worse. Guilt, exhaustion and anger can build. But, the strongest families are those who plan how to resolve their problems, communicate their concerns and cooperate in resolving their conflicts. In short, strong families fight stress by working on their problems together.
Plan
To handle time, money and other pressures, establish priorities to bring structure to how you will approach them. When you work on the budget, for instance, include older children to help them learn about money and planning. Bring the family together to plan each week’s and year’s schedule, including vacations and visits from friends or relatives. Schedule in time when you’ll all have fun together.
Communicate
Set aside time each week for the whole family to get together to talk about feelings and needs. Listen to all family members and take their concerns seriously. Never refuse an invitation to talk by a child, sibling or spouse. If it isn’t a convenient time, ask if you can get back together later that day (and keep your appointment!). If it’s an important issue, forget about convenience and make the time to talk.
Cooperate
No one should be responsible for the entire family. Discuss ways of sharing emotional, financial and household tasks. If the stress of working long hours or an exhausting job leaves an adult with little time or energy for the family, discuss ways that the rest of the family can provide support. If a child is struggling in school, other family members can help by assuming some of the child’s chores or assisting with tutoring. The family can offer healthy support if everyone makes an effort.
Family Health
Getting exercise, eating well, limiting alcohol intake and other stress reducing habits can make a major difference in how well families get along. Couples also need to take time together, without children or other distractions. These habits are sometimes difficult to practice, but they can help keep stress manageable and make your family happier, healthier and stronger than ever.
